The conference began with a very long sermon about Disciples, which honestly I didn't really catch the drift of, because I wasn't sure if the woman was talking about the characteristics of a disciple or the end times or...! I think my brain was also warming up to human speech and so unfortunately I didn't quite absorb the first testimony.
But after that, it was impossible not to be drawn in my the raw honesty and confronting confessions about sin and rebellion and enslavement faced by those giving their testimonies, and the liberation and fulfilling joy they experienced through faith and deliverance in Jesus Christ.
I cannot possibly recount every single testimony, but I hope that such honesty will be a norm in church so that community can be put to the test, to help and love and support in practical ways.
I wrote a short devo based on the benediction the Pastor shared as he closed the conference.
Mark 12:13-17
"Later they sent some of the Pharisees and Herodians to Jesus to catch him in his words. They came to him and said, “Teacher, we know that you are a man of integrity. You aren’t swayed by others, because you pay no attention to who they are; but you teach the way of God in accordance with the truth. Is it right to pay the imperial tax to Caesar or not? Should we pay or shouldn’t we?”
But Jesus knew their hypocrisy.“Why are you trying to trap me?” he asked. “Bring me a denarius and let me look at it.”
They brought the coin, and he asked them, “Whose image is this? And whose inscription?”
“Caesar’s,” they replied.
Then Jesus said to them, “Give back to Caesar what is Caesar’s and to God what is God’s.”
And they were amazed at him."
The pharisees tried to ensnare Jesus with a tricky and politically charged question. Jesus' answer was masterful because it took their question away from the natural to the spiritual. When Jesus said give what is Caesar's to Caesar and what is God's to God, he invoked the pharisee's knowledge of the Torah, the old testament texts, wherein man was made in God's image. Just as the coin, stamped with Caesar's image, wholly belonged to the Roman emperor, so we, stamped with the imprint of God, belong wholly to God.
This taught me a few things. First, before we tackle the petty technicalities of our faith (eg tax collection in this context), we must understand the basics of our faith and be obedient and submit to God's will for us. It is no good asking a new born baby to eat a carrot, he'll only choke. You must start him on puree and build from there. Likewise, our faith and understanding of theology should be built on a basic foundation of understanding God's nature and our relationship with him and his commands for us. This is perhaps why I used to stumble so much when I contemplated questions like election, homosexuality, women's rights in the bible sense... I thought only if I could fully understand all these intricate things then I would place my faith in God and be willing to find out more about him. But a relationship doesn't work like that, you must know the person before you can consider his values/deeds. I must know more about God before I can think over his ordinances and this way I'll actually have better understanding of his plans and purposes!
Second, we must give ourselves fully to God. In the conference, we sang 'Christ is enough'. One line went 'I have decided to follow Jesus no turning back'. When we give ourselves entirely to God, we must ask for his power to drive away our stubborn clinging on to sin, so that we can serve and follow him with our whole hearts. Because God wants a broken spirit and a contrite heart purged of sin, not one that serves 2 masters. Letting go of sin is hard, because sin is pleasurable, sin somehow makes us feel less vulnerable, and sin helps us feel accepted by the world. However, if we are claimed by Jesus
who gave his whole self to us, we must return to him. I suppose practically in my life i need to really saturate myself in his word, and most importantly be not just generous but completely surrendering my time, love, energy to God and his purpose. This means reading my bible at every opportunity - not hiding it on my bag on the train because it's embarrassing. It also means confronting my friends about apparent sins in their lives, speaking to them in love about Gods truth and really caring for them spiritually, even thought i am afraid of conflict or awkwardness in relationships.
And so that is what I took away from the conference: to really live as a child of God, a child who burns brightly for him and loves him and hopes to in some measure walk in his footsteps for his glory.
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