Wednesday, May 14, 2014

NOISE




Today was so awfully crowded in the canteen, and everyone was talking talking talking, and the walls of sound became waves of sound that felt like they were physically battering me (on a side note, I love Batter my Heart-John Donne)

I tried to go back to that weekend by the beach when Hannah and I floated in between a little space in the rocks while the waves crashed around us, and the beautiful moments of space when I would dive under an oncoming wave to hear a dull roar that deadened noise.

But I couldn't

memory betrayed me and I was drowning in the words and the people around me I felt corroded by conversation, serrated by speech and even my island of silence could not protect me

'what up miri'

Meat eater



On Good Friday Emily surprised me by telling me she had decided to become vegetarian

(although I really shouldn't be surprised since Emily is AN ACTIVST and someone with heaps better self control than me and therefore strong and capable enough to confine herself to worthy abstinence whereas I--- well you shall see)

Anyway after seeing her eat a plate of bean curd and egg with rice one day at a chicken rice shop, and after myself trying and failing to do the same (I couldn't help it and stole some of Timmy's chicken), I was absolutely Disgusted at myself.

How could I sit there and HEARTLESSLY eat chicken in front of my best friend who was actually consciously making a stand against murder and environmental degradation?

And thus I resolved to become vegetarian for a week, two weeks hence.

Later, I changed the duration to 2 weeks because Emily says that the second week is the hardest and I felt up for a challenge.

Anyway, vegetarian week began on Monday the 12th, as I so excitedly told most people in my chapel band and class. And I succeeded.

Vegetarian week ended on Tuesday the 13th because I had chicken for breakfast, and realised that I am a sinful creature who will never be able to completely place the comfort of another creature above my own probably until I find a husband and have children

Still, I am going to finish this vegetarian challenge-I missed laarp at dinner today (My favourite Laotian minced meat) and so things look pretty good

Wish me luck

and please please

don't tempt me

The spirit is willing but the body is weak.

Saturday, May 3, 2014

hallucinations



sometimes when i get really sleepy i start hallucinating

Today when i was in the MFA scholarship talk

I started feeling really sleepy and light heated

The rostrum morphed into a canoe, and white flies buzzed around the heads of the audience

The speaker faded into the wall and emerged again

From the corner of my eye i spotted a man in sandy coloured clothes standing beside me but when i looked he was gone

i don't know whether these dreams frighten me or excite me (ALTERNATE UNIVERSES PERHAPS)

Please excuse me it is 11:38 and for all i know this computer is not real

Friday, May 2, 2014

Thankles



I just had this weird idea that people should write messages of thanks on their ankles, and call them thankles

And when you crossed your legs you'd think of how much everyone has done for you

I think people would have to tattoo God on their ankles