My guide to being alone

"Society is afraid of alone though, 

like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements, 

like people must have problems if, after awhile, nobody is dating them 

But alone is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless 

and lonely is healing if you make it."

-Tanya Davis

Listen to your breathing. It is a marvellous thing. Imagine how much you mother and father yearned to hear that sound the nine months before you were pushed into the world.

Listen to your crying. It's the same as above. Record your sad moments and talk to a camera as you do. You realise in that moment either how ridiculous, how beautiful, or how dire your sadness is.

Eat breakfast in every possible configuration. In bed, at your desk, sitting on the kitchen counter. Lying on the floor, sitting on the floor, walking around. I haven't yet tried headstands, because I don't want to waste my porridge.

Watch the movies that you watched when you were younger. Watching movies is often best alone. Cry over the baby field mice in 'The Animals of Farthing Wood', finally figure out that Mary was putting an ivory elephant in her night dress pocket, not a spoonful of porridge, realise that Spirited Away was neither as frightening nor as good as your six year old self judged and wonder if your judgement now is any better.

Sometimes have dance parties. But you must know when, and to what music. Time it out, with spaces, to preserve the special-ness and also to avoid annoying anyone downstairs. 

Eat both the bad food (that vegan palak paneer) and the good food (that vegan shepherd's pie) you cook, and eat bananas if you need to. They taste better with granola and almond butter.

Go on solitary journeys and adventures and sing as you cycle alone.

And listen to this poem:

'cause if you're happy in your head then solitude is blessed and alone is okay.